The Ugly, The Bad and most of all The Good!

I have noticed over the years that when bad things are happening in my life, I tend to not write. It is as if somewhere in my mind there is the feeling that if I don't write about it that it didn't really happen. During the past few months we have been hit with one bad thing after another in our family. It all started when Bill was diagnosed with cancer. It was found during a routine check. How could my very active husband have the dreaded word "cancer?" (We have been working through his treatment, and things are going very well.) Shortly after that, Ethel was put in the hospital with multiple problems and well since March, I have had someone either in the hospital or in the ER every 2 weeks. It is really bad when the ER staff knows you by name, and well, you know them as well. It has just been a bit of an ugly stretch for our family. This all caused so much stress that it sort of made me sick with bleeding ulcers and sleep deprivation and that was bad.

However, through all of this there has been much good . . .

In preparation for recieving the priesthood, Daniel learned to how to tie his own tie.

Well lets try that again Daniel. . .

Jessica was once again on the YMCA Swimteam and she with her fellow Barracudas finished the season winning the North Suburan Confernce title. Jessica greatly improved her times this year and will continue to swim 1000 meters, 3 days a week in prep to be on her High School team in the fall. Jessica isn't built like many of the other girls, at first that was a great disavantage until her coaches put her to swiming the power strokes. Seems that she is built perfectly for those. That would be the Freestyle and the Butterfly. She won many personal ribbons this year. We are very pleased.

Between events we spend a lot of time at what is called the "crash site." Here the swimmers re-fuel, re-hydrate, and relax--it is extreemly noisy. The avarage meet lasts 4-5 hours. All of the events are under 1 minute of swimming. Jessica usually participated in 3-5 events. I spent my time knitting.

At the beginning of June I was released as Relief Society President. I was exteemly sad, however somewhat releaved as well. During my time as RS Pres. Our family developed a wonderful relationship with the missionaries. Now I think it is in the book they have, that the Helm famliy is weird, but always has extra seats at the table for dinner. We have them at least 2 times each month. It greatly enriches our lives meeting and getting to know these young men. As time moves while they are on thier missions, they miss things they did before they left. One of the things our Elders missed at the beginning of June was going to camp (Scout camp, and Girls camp was the first 2 weeks of June) So we built a fire in the fire pit and let them cook dinner for us over the camp fire. We also introduced them to a family favorite--Wookie Vomit.

Elder Jensen and Elder MacIntire couldn't wait. . .

Mandy turned 22 on July 3rd and we forgot to take pictures of most of her birthday stuff, except Jessica was so proud of making her fruit pizza that she took a picture of it early. Notice that the fruit spells the word "Happpy"

Each year, on the 4th of July we have a family tradition--we get up early and make doughnuts in the shape of stars. This year the missionaries wanted to be a part of this tradition. We then take the doughnuts to the ward picnic.

Daniel and Josh told the Elders that at the end, when we don't have much dough left we make doughut holes and then we get to eat the doughnut holes. That is when they quit making doughnuts and concentrated on the holes.

Daniel turned 12 on July 10th. We celebrated with a Pirates cake made out of cupcakes.

Matthew felt that the ultra green frosting that was way toooooo thick was good for only 1 thing. . . . .a new type of hair gel. I don't think it will fly, however it probably did attract flies.


All in all, so far it has been a pretty good summer. We have read some really good books, watched some movies, and played many games. Most of all we have enjoyed being a family.

Perspective

I was praying this evening when I had one of those "oh I get it" moments and I thought I should share it with you. Often over the course of my life when I have been praying for help in something or for an answer to a question I have gotten the answer "Be still and know that I am God". Being a rather impatient person, I really hate it when I get that answer, sort of equating it to the parent who tells the child "I'll be with you in a moment, just wait". But tonight when I got that answer I got something more, kind of like an understanding of that answer in a way that I had never thought of before. It isn't Heavenly Father telling me "just wait" it is more of a "Stand back and see the miracles I am working constantly in your life." I want you to know that there are many times in my life when things have been really overwhelming, sort of like now. But I know beyond any doubt that my Heavenly Father loves me and that he pours out blessings to me and my family every day. I have seen many miracles and continue to see them, not just once in a while, but each day of my life. I have huge testimony of the Plan of Salvation, Gods plan for me and my family and my place in that plan. If it takes going through these hardships to have that knowledge than it is a price that I will pay, because I can't imagine life without knowing that He loves me. I don't know a time when I didn't know that. Elder Neil A. Maxwell (I think) once said that part of having faith in God is having faith in His timetable. I forgot that for a bit today. I guess what I am saying, is that I will do whatever the Lord asks of me, because I know that He will make it possible for me to do whatever that is. I have seen in again and again in my life. I have been richly blessed. I understand the concept of blessings coming as from the windows of Heaven and know that my life has shown this to be a true promise from God. What a blessing it is to be able to talk things out with our Heavenly Father!

Jessica's First Parade

Jessica stressed about it. She worried that she wouldn't be able to march the 5K parade route. Finding out that her cousin Sophie had run 5K helped relieve her mind on that score. She practiced. She stressed some more--what if she forgot the music?! Finally the day has arrived. It is the day of her first parade and she is going into the day with mixed feelings.

The Band is gathered at the staging point 1 1/2 hours before the begining of the parade. Now they wait. . .

Meanwhile our family has found a good spot to see the parade. We live just 2 blocks from the traditional St Joseph parade route. Annette and 4 of her children are stranded here in St Joseph while work is being done on thier car. A parade is a good thing to pass the time. So we wait. . .

The Band continues to wait. . .

The wait can drive you crazy. . .crazy. . .finally you just have to blow off some steam as you wait. . . and wait. . . and wait. . .

Boredom has set in on the curb. Books, knitting, and crocheting fill the time. Will the parade ever start??? Aunt Cheryl are they coming yet?? As we wait. . . and wait. . .

Then we hear the drum line. It is the cadance of our school. Jessica marches by playing her Melephone, smiling all the while. We cheer. She is practacally dancing down the street. Jessica is the second from the right in the below picture.

We all know that there are spoils of parades. In our family we find it amusing that Josh, our diabetic seems to have tons of candy quite literally thrown into his lap. No matter where he moved to, he was still the favorite target. It is alright. The haul is for all, and Mom will give most of it away in the next couple of weeks.

Winter Quarters

Today we traveled to Winter Quarters for a temple trip. Bill and I usually make this trip each month. We live about 2 3/4 hours from the temple, so it takes most of the day for a single session. For this reason we plan our trips on Saturday. Up until last fall, Ethel went to the temple each week with a couple in our ward who are temple workers. Last fall she developed a peculiar type of car sickness that manifested itself in gripy bowels. After the second time the couple left her at a truck stop and called me to come and get her, I put a stop to her going with them. (Who leaves an 83 year old lady at the truck stop by herself????) So today, armed with extra clothes, towels, etc--Matt and Mandy got the day off from work so they could help her in and out of the car (Bill had to work), we began the trip. The plan was for the children to enjoy the visitor center. With starts and stops and cleaning up, we arrived at the temple 4 1/2 hours later. During the trip. . .






Josh and Jessica slept in a pile in the back seat.

Daniel watched everything out the window and while he looked rather bored, he only stated so once during the entire day. Matt took care of the CD player and Mandy snoozed and snapped pictures.

When we arrived at the visitor center, we took the opportunity to watch the Joseph Smith movie. It was an inspirational way to get the mood back for the remainder of the day. Then it was time for Ethel and I to go for our session at the temple. While we were there. . .

The children got to dress up in pioneer gear and then go through the hands on exhibit. Daniel did his cool dude pose in cowboy gear.

The next phase of the exhibit was bunks on a ship, made life size. My 3 boys would have had to share this small bunk for the entire trip across the ocean.

Jessica and Mandy would have also had to share a bunk, however they would have either had to have all of the family things that weren't in storage or another sister sharing with them. How about it Rachel??

Finally after being cramped across the see and then sitting on raw board seats on a train, and then a river trip, they would begin the treck with the handcart. A family our size with 8 people would have had only 1 cart, however since Matt is an adult, we might have been able to have part of a second cart. No such luck with the girls being adults though. Each family member would have been allowed only so much on the cart. Bill, Myself, Matt and Mandy--17 lbs each, Jessica and Joshua--13 lbs, Daniel--11 lbs. When you consider that my standard size scriptures weigh 5 lbs, that is really not very much. We have handcart pioneer roots. Our family came across in the Willy handcart company. I am humbled and greatful for the sacrifices that our ancestors went through in coming to Salt Lake. Because of thier testimony and faith, we have been blessed for what is now the 5th generation since that time. It is a legacy of faith handed down to us, it is who we are, both by culture and by choice. We are blessed.

Warriors

This past couple of weeks have been a much needed spritual boost for our family. First General Conference, and then this past weekend a broadcast Stake Conference. In listening to both I have pondered the rolls we has parents take in raising our children.

I have always loved history. In any given time period there are things I love, but my most favored time period is the Medieval time period. My boys love playing with toy swords, and for many years now any stick still becomes a sword. They are actually quite good. I was thinking that if we lived in a keep, they would all be quite acomplished warriors right now, or at least in training to be a knight.

At age 8 they would have been given thier first sword and through careful teaching they would have been taught how to use them. These warriors in training would be given careful training in battle techniques and weaponry. Instead we gave our children a set of scriptures and taught them how to find the answers to their questions. Instead of training we had Primary, Sacrament Meeting and Family Home Evening.

At age 12 the Medieval warrior would begin to go in small skirmishes. They would also begin to learn property management and protection techniques. At age 12 my sons (Daniel will follow in 3 months) became Deacons and began learning how to serve within the ward with passing the Sacrament and collecting Fast Offerings. They have also learned many character building techniques in Scouts and Young Mens.

At age 14 our young warrior is old enough to be a squire. He wouldn't be the primary squire, but would begin training in the care of his Lords weapons. He would learn the proper care of clothes and would fight along side the primary squire at his Lords back. Now at 14 our young sons become Teachers in the Prieshood of God, They become Home Teachers, learning to care for those who they have stewardship over. Thier other training continues, but now we have the addition of Early Morning Seminary. For this they must sacrifice sleep to learn more of our Heavenly Father, His plan for us, and a more in depth study of the scriptures.

At age 16 the warrior of old takes over full primary squire duties. He will now be sent on errands for his Lord, checking up on other properties, or going ahead to prepare for the arivial of him whom he serves. He will also be given the job of helping his younger sqires to take over when it is their turn. This is the most intesive part of his training as he moves into the final years of becoming a knight. Our 16 year old sons have reached the age of becoming Priests and now begin to Bless the Sacrament. Serve as assistant to the Bishop and teach younger Scouts, helping them to achieve new ranks. He has many people to help him along the way. Home and Family, Scout and Young Mens leaders, Sunday School and Seminary Teachers and the Bishopric. This is an intesive time of preparation.

Between 18 and 19 our Medieval young men approach that time when they begin the trials. The time when the must show what they have learned to become a knight. They are tested to see what skills they have learned. It all comes down to preparation. They then wait to see if they have made it, becoming a full knight--what will thier assignment be. Where will they go. Two weeks ago Matt finished his papers. He is an Elder in the Priesthood and serves in the Elders Quorum as Secretary. He is called upon many times to serve those in the ward. This is not something new, he has prepared carefully. Now we wait. . . where will his assignment be. . . He is now prepared to become a full Warrior of God.

Finished

I consider it a victory that I have avoided startitis for an entire month now. Meanwhile I have been finishing up a few projects. First is the 2 sweaters for the twins. I don't think I will make this pattern again for a bit. I have made it 6 times now and am quite board with it. That is alright, I have many other patterns to work from. Truth, I have had 13 friends who have had babies in the last 8 months and I have knitted baby things for most of them. I am tired of baby clothes for now. Currently I am finishing the white baby afgan, only one more row one one more side to go. Here are the sweaters for the twins. I like the pink one, but I love the green one.

The Laundry Act of 2009

Back when my children were little it seemed like there was tons of laundry, however I could usually get it all done in 1 or 2 days each week. As each of my children have become 13 they have become responsible for thier own laundry. You would think that this would make the job easier. . .NOT!! Now we have 5 children (those still living at home) and Ethel all wanting to do thier laundry on Saturday. If not Saturday, then they put a load in, then think that the load magically goes from washer to folded in thier drawers in a blink. Soooo for the past 2 months I have had an enormous pile of laundry in my kitchen. NOT my favorite thing as I have a sort of toy sized kitchen, and who on earth puts the laundry stuff in the kitchen that is toy sized to begin with?? So today when I was wading to get to the washer to wash mine and Bill's laundry, I was frustrated when I came upon a load, who knows how long it had been in the washer, and there was a WET load in the dryer, well to say that I came slightly unhinged is an understatment. Good news is that everyone was home this evening, so we called a family counsel and came up with the following. . . .

The Laundry Act of 2009

Monday--Jessica and Communal
Tuesday--Matt and Mandy
Wednesday--Ethel
Thursday--Josh and Daniel
Friday--Bill and Cheryl
Saturday--Communal
Sunday--Emergency only


Articles

1. If you don’t do your laundry on your day, you must get permission to use someone else’s day.
2. If you empty laundry supplies tell Mandy.
3. Get your laundry out of the Kitchen on your day!!!!
4. Use your basket to transport YOUR laundry.
5. Basket snatching will NOT be tolerated.
6. Laundry left in the kitchen will have to be earned back.
7. Using another’s day without their permission will be dealt with by Mom and Dad SEVERELY.

Will this work????? who knows, but I am going crazy right now. It is a contract. I am amazed how well a contract works with teens and young adults who lives in your home. Truthfully the one I am worried about the most on this one is Ethel. Just how will we deal with Ethel if she breaks the rules. . . .?