Endurance

I never realized just how much it takes to endure being sick until I had a few months of feeling really great.  For the past few months I have feeling really great.  I have lost 37 pounds, been walking most days, took a few trips,and learned some new things.  Mostly I have been able to work daily toward the goals I set for myself as I spent weeks on bedrest last fall and earlier this year.  But once again I am sick.   This time with pain in my chest.  The doctors ran a bazillion tests encluding a heart cath--my heart is good.  But now I have to heal from these tests before they can run some more so that hopefully we will know just what is causing the chest pain.  It is a fact that I have had a taste of being pretty healthy and now long for it once again, so I am impatient with being sick and just want the answer so we can fix it.  I wonder if my past endurance with pain and illness is that I really haven't known anything else for years, because for 3 months I felt free for the first time in years and right now I just feel trapped.  I guess I just need to zen out for a bit and trust that this is all part of the plan.  But I really need to get well soon, school starts on August 30.  I have plans and goals to reach--and a whole lot more weight.  I need to be able to move!